A man went to see his doctor, complaining that he hadn’t been feeling well lately. The doctor examined him and prescribed three types of pills.
“Take the green one with a large glass of water when you wake up,” said the doctor. “Take the blue one with a big glass of water after lunch, and the red one with another large glass of water just before bed.”
The man, surprised by the amount of medication, asked, “Doc, what’s wrong with me?”
The doctor replied, “You’re not drinking enough water.”
One day, Pete complained to his friend, “I have such a headache. Maybe I should see a doctor.”
His friend responded, “Don’t bother with that. There’s a computer at the drug store that can diagnose anything faster and cheaper than a doctor. Just tell it your symptoms, give it a sample of your urine, and it’ll tell you what’s wrong and what to do about it. It only costs $20.”
Pete thought he had nothing to lose, so he filled a jar with a urine sample and went to the drug store. He poured the sample into the computer, paid the $20, and watched as the machine buzzed and flashed lights.
After a brief pause, a slip of paper popped out, reading: “You have migraines. Take better care of yourself. Rest, drink plenty of fluids, and avoid bright lights, stress, and strain. See me again in two weeks.”
Excited by how efficient this technology was, Pete thought it could revolutionize medicine. But soon, he started wondering if the machine could be tricked. So, he decided to test it. He mixed tap water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples from his wife and daughter, and even some oil from his car. He returned to the drug store, poured the concoction into the computer, and paid the $20 again, stating he had a headache.
The machine whirred, flashed, and printed out a new analysis:
“Your tap water contains too much waste.
Your dog has ringworms.
Your teenage daughter is pregnant.
Your wife has had five lovers in the past six months.
Your car needs a new radiator.
And you wonder why you have a headache?”
