He assumed it was physical.
Most men do.
They look for a cause they can point to.
Something they can take credit for.
A specific action that explains everything.
But what made her lose control had nothing to do with that.
It was timing.
It was the realization that she had spent most of her life regulating herself—for others.
Being careful not to want too much.
Not to respond too strongly.
Not to make anyone uncomfortable.
And suddenly, she was done.
Losing control didn’t mean chaos.
It meant permission.
Permission she finally gave herself.
What unraveled her wasn’t intensity—it was absence.
The absence of judgment.
The absence of expectation.
The absence of needing to be anything other than present.
That’s why her reaction surprised him.
It didn’t build gradually.
It didn’t follow a pattern he recognized.
It arrived all at once.
Men often believe control is lost when desire becomes too strong.
But for many older women, control is lost when restraint is no longer necessary.
And that distinction changes everything.
